April 1, 2010

Trailer Mania: Action Fest 2010

The Expendables
If Valentines Day is the great ensemble romantic comedy of the year than "The Expendables" is the great ensemble action movie of the year. Jeez, I hope that action movie gods can forgive me for that statement, but if the trailer is any indication this movie looks beyond ridiculous. There doesn't seem to be a single piece of the movie that isn't over the top, from the cheesy music in the middle of the trailer, to the obligatory asian joke, and finally to the totally awesome narration of the whole thing. For me, as long as it stays rated R, this is the top action movie of the summer. I mean with a cast like this how can it not be the meatiest thing since sloppy joes with hot dogs and bacon.

The A-Team
Ahh, this one is a tough one, it's easy to see from the trailer that there a lot of wildly cool shit going on here. Briefly: we have tanks engaged in mid-air battles, high rise stunts, daring vehicle escapes, and Wikus Van De Merwe, but not fooocking prawns man! They need to have less jokes and more ass kicking if they really want to pack the house. Neeson needs to stop smiling and start getting back in Taken mode. "I told you I find you!" Whaaaaaat?

Angelina returns to the action genre and it looks like instead of curving bullets she is now just changing her hair color. Glad to see she is still adept at driving vehicles and jumping around like a female frog though. Could a return to the "Tomb Raider" franchise be next? As for the film, I think it could be a highly enjoyable political thriller like director Phillip Noyce's 90's classics "Patriot Games" and "Clear and Present Danger" or it could be another Angelina snooze fest like "Beyond Borders." I'll give it this, the concept of the whole mistaken identity thing is interesting, let's hope the rest of the film can ride it to action party town.

As long as this is R-Rated, this movie will probably be kick a lot of ass. Unlike the previous Predator outing AVP Requiem, which had a title similar to an opera for automobiles, this one has a solid cast. I totally buy Brody as a elite special forces Pianist (I mean maniac) and the whole concept is so simple, it will be hard for this movie to suck. Here's the formula: badass people get put on a badass planet hunted by badass intergalatic badasses with should mounted lasers. Done.

While not as hyped as the other movies above, this one deserves to be mentioned because director Neil Marshall has been silently making a name for himself as interesting director. Sure "Doomsday" was a mess, but it was a guilty pleasure of a mess. "The Descent" is a classic and "Dog Soldiers" is enjoyable as it's well. The movie looks like an extended version of the first third of Gladiator, which is a brutal part of the film that people often forget.


  1. see, the tanks fighting in the air thing is what almost ruins it for me.

  2. that A team is having too much fun.