August 31, 2009

Action God's Bring The Thunder!

And so it was written, on this day, the 31st day of August in the year of 2010 that the action movie God's realized their responsibilities and smiled a diabolical smile on all of us mortals. For today is that day that "Bad Boys 3" was announced, and "Rambo 5" was green lit. Let us rejoice and be glad.

Disney Marvel Cross Over Possibilities

Today Disney announced that is buying Marvel Entertainment for 4 Billion dollars. When you consider the direction both of these companies are heading, this acquisition is very interesting. Marvel has been doing very well recently and their upcoming films including Thor (starring my main meng Chris Hemsworth) and Iron Man 2 look to continue their streak of quality films. Disney on the other hand, well, I don't think they are doing to bad either. So I must wonder, why this deal even happened. The reason:


So here are some possibilities for Disney-Marvel cross over potential.

1. Mickey Mouse in Edgar Wright's "Ant Man"- He could play a zany mouse that gives Ant Man shit, but then becomes his friend and ally in the climax of the film.

2. Simba In The Avengers- He'd totally fit in, I mean he could even play Captain America.

3. Mulan Makes A Cameo In the Upcoming Wolverine Sequel- "I'll make a man out of you, bub"

4. Iron Man 2 Will Now Have Songs - Iron Man and War Machine will sing an updated bro-tastic machine gun driven version of "Can You Feel The Love Tonight" while they dispatch countless threats with their shoulder mounted cannons.

5. Pixar + Marvel= Geek Fanboy Dream Come True.

August 28, 2009

 I wish you an incredible weekend.

The Men Who Stare At Goats Trailer

Looks great.

The FINAL movie of the summer

So here we are, the final movie of the summer: The Final Destination. It got ripped in Variety yesterday as having a plot as developed "as a text message," but I don't care. By all logical reasoning, I shouldn't be rolling deep to this movie this evening, but there is a distinct lack of logic in Los Angeles, so I guess I'm playing the part.

The movies are so simple they could be considered genius (could is the key word here). A group of people avoid a catastrophic event and then slowly get killed in super creative Rube Goldberg devil schemes.

Imagine if someone got blown up at the end of that, and you'd have a general idea of what's going down this series. The thrill of the series lies in the execution of these set-ups, the knowledge that everyone knows what's coming, and that it can't be stopped. For that reason, the films must be viewed in a packed theatre to do them justice. So if you are even remotely interested, you owe it yourself for one FINAL movie of the summer.

** With this being the last movie of the summer, you can expect a Summer movie wrap up on Monday.

August 27, 2009

Cloverfield 2 Viral Marketing Begins

Update: Sources tell me that "Cloverfield 2" has already been shot. Rumors abound say that the film was shot in tandem with the upcoming "Cabin in the Woods." With the real life upcoming film from Drew Goddard and Matt Reeves serving as a cover for Cloverfield 2 production. The film deals other cities being attacked by the monsters. This would make sense considering this is the Santa Monica Promenade in Los Angeles.

Michael Crichton And The Return Of Reading

The first thing I remember reading correctly was a road sign. I was cruising along in the backside of forrest green mini van when I spotted the sign, and everything just clicked into place. I thought to myself two things: 

1) That sign definitely says "SLOW."
2) Now that you can read, what do you do now?

Well the obvious answer was start reading books, not some children books, but some real deal books, the ones that are about as  thick as a diesel hamburger. At my brother's recommendation I dove into one author in particular: the legendary Michael Chrichton.

You name the book I read it. Congo, Sphere, Jurassic Park, Timeline, State of Fear, Prey, Next, Great Train Robbery, The Box Car Children, uh just kidding, don't know how that got in there.

So when awoke this morning to learn that he has one more book coming out after his death, I was excited. When I learned it's historical fiction about pirates (real deal pirates, not these wanna be young jacks in the Carribbean, old school parrot talking, plank walking, and eypatch rocking pirates) I was jazzed. The book comes out on November 24th, Spielberg is already talking about directing the feature adaptation. Time to enlist back in the high seas of literary adventure.

August 26, 2009

August 25, 2009

Cred Confessions: One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

My journey of seeing classic films to build my film credibility continued last night with "One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest." Wow. Talk about an incredible movie, one that moved me in the same way that I'm sure it moved audiences when it was first released in 1975.

It's no surprise that it totally annihilated the competition at the Academy Awards, taking picture, director, best actor, best actress, and best adapted screenplay. But with the hardware aside, the film still manages to be so powerful because it serves as a testament to the raw power of acting. EVERYONE in the movie delivers a stunning performance, even the small supporting roles like the security guards.

One of the most interesting parts of the film for me were the scenes where the academics are trying to determine if Mr. Nicholson was crazy or not. They stuck with me because the men in the tweed jackets, just like us the viewer are not sure about the main characters sanity. It's a great dynamic that electrifies the film, and one that continues to debated.  

Next Up for the Cred Confessions: Pacino's "Serpico"

August 23, 2009

Inglourious Basterds And WW II Responsibility

"Inglorious Basterds" is a wild night at the pictures, it's full of great action, hair splitting suspense, and some top notch acting, especially from Christoph Waltz as Colonel Hans Landa. Tarantino, who I am not completely sold on as a "master" director has crafted a great film, one that many people will adore. Yet at the end of the day, I feel uncomfortable with it, in fact, I view it as irresponsible.

Not too long ago, I spent a large chunk of my Saturday playing Call of Duty: World At War. I was mowing down wave after wave of German and Japanese soldiers in virtual re-enactments of WW II battles. While it was fun, I couldn't help but think that these battles were real situations that occurred in the past. My grandparent's generation trials and turmoils had now become my point and shoot adventure. "Inglorious Basterds" provides that same type of war is a video game feel. 

Characters are given wild names: "Aldo The Apache" for the dashing hero, The Bear Jew for the torturer, and of course "The Jew Hunter" for the evil villain. At some points in the film, some characters are given brief colorful biographies (similar to this video game) that are suited to a video game . The violence in the film while gritty and bloody, carries no consequence, just the same way a video game can. This idea of violence without consequence unsettles me because the film features real characters who are responsible for some of history's most heinous acts.

Now, I understand that it may be strange to hear TPG, the lover of action cinema to take issue with violence in a movie (I can't wait for blood fest of Final Destination), yet one must be sensitive about WW II when presenting it to audiences. In the film Hitler and Goebells, too very real genocidal maniacs are portrayed as as almost clown like, and I'm sure many people in the world don't see them as that. I worry that to the young kids growing up killing Germans on fictional battlefields that a movie like "Inglorious Basterds" will weaken their understanding of the horrors of the Third Reich.

And while I have zero sympathy for the Nazis, I can't help but think about the message the film sends about war in general. War is a dirty nasty thing waged but ordinary folks who transform into killers. This transformation is never addressed in the film. How do ordinary American men become bloodthirsty warriors and do they never feel any emotion besides blood lust, even when they're own comrades die? The film makes a huge deal about how the Basterds feel about nazi's potentially returning to society after the war. But what about the Basterds. Are we lead to assume that the scalping bloodthirsty warriors will just waltz back to picket fences and nine to five jobs with no psychological damage?

Cinema features promptly in the film, the climax of the film involves a premiere and the potential destructive power of actual film stock. So it is disappointing that Tarantino, didn't understand the importance that a filmmaker has when telling a WWII story. In my eyes, he won't be considered one of the great directors of our time until he figure out how to tell one, until then he'll just be, dare, I say, inglorious?

August 21, 2009

Have A Great Weekend

Yes that is Timon and Pumba
Hakuna Matata
Enjoy the Weekend

Youth In Revolt Trailer

Watch more Moviefone videos on AOL Video

This looks like a "Junofied" version of Adaptation or Mr. Brooks depending on what you're into.

Posse At War Flicks: The Guns of Navarone

In honor of "Inglorious Basterds" coming out today (shoulda had a review today, for that I apologize, please don't scalp me) I've decided to briefly highlight my favorite P.A.W. movie: "The Guns of Navarone". P.A.W. stands for POSSE AT WAR, aka just a group of bros going on secret missions behind enemy lines, icing up bad guys, and talking about fine dames. Other activities include slaying, rooting out turncoat spies, tough guy swagger talk, and last but certainly not the least, saving the world from the forces of evil.

In this PAW flick, the posse has to destroy a massive gun battery built into the Greek mountains. While I don't want to spoil the film, it has a tremendous ending that I rank as one of the best climaxes of the genre. Gregory Peck perhaps best known to young audiences as the stern wise Atticus Finch in the adaptation of "To Kill A Mockingbird" stars in the flick as the leader of the posse. He brings it hard both on the acting front and on the words of "Basterds" the "killing nazi" front.

August 20, 2009

Will Avatar Suck?

It looks like a video game. That was my first thought when I saw the trailer for James Cameron's upcoming Science Fiction film "Avatar." Watch the trailer here on I couldn't figure out how to embed a high quality version on the sight, so instead you'll have to deal with the moderately interesting and vaguely creepy poster on the left.

Of course the trailer isn't in 3D. I imagine the film will look completely different when viewed that way, after all it is the intended medium of the film. But either way, I don't see how the 3D effects will stop some of the graphics from looking like Final Fantasy 40 or something similar.

I shouldn't write it off yet. The motion capture humans look incredible, definitely the best I have ever seen and the color pallet of the film looks vivid. I'll give it a chance, I gotta see this trailer again, hopefully in 3D, here's hoping it's attached to "Final Destination 4." Oh man, Final Destination 4, calm down, can't wait.

Check back in later in the day, I'll embed it on the site for your enjoyment/disappointment.

August 19, 2009

Where The Wild Things Are Preview

LET THE WILD RUMPUS BEGIN!!! And so it does, because today, David Egger's has released part of his story adaptation of "Where the Wild Things Are." As the screenwriter of the upcoming Spike Jonze film, Eggers' has taken a classic picture book and crafted a short narrative which serves as a pseudo preview for the film. Featured in the most current issue of The New Yorker the piece clearly is inspired from the film/book (READ IT HERE), and many of the classic elements of the book are present. Max runs around in his wolf suit, wishes he could grow up, and goes to that spot where you know, uh, the wild things are.

While the most recent trailer is brilliantly effective (see my post about it here), this literary preview that Eggers' wrote really has gotten me jazzed up because it's a first taste of the tone of the film. Eggers is one of the best writers alive now, his books stick with you like some type of persistent syrup after doing the dishes after a delicious pancake breakfast. Check out this paragraph below

Max looked around to see if anyone was close. It seemed strange that a boat like this, a sturdy, viable boat, would be unoccupied. He had been coming to the bay for years and had never seen a boat like this, alone and without an owner. There was no sign of anyone nearby. The boat was his if he wanted it.

I recommend that you print out the whole thing before you read it. Don't read writing this good on the computer screen, there is something magical about holding well written prose in your hands. It's like the paper captures a little bit of zest that comes off the words. At this rate if the film can translate the magic of Eggers' work onto the screen, then damn, what a wild wild rumpus the film will be.

August 18, 2009

Common and McLovin (Just A Usual Tuesday)

Mongolian Death Worm Attack

In the history of animal nomenclature, nothing has ever come close to a name as cool as "Mongolian Death Worm." In fact I think "Cheetah" and "Komodo Dragon" are a distant second to that name. It's a shame then that the "MDW" is a potentially imaginary creature, because, damn, that name really brings the thunder.

Yet not everyone believes that this creature is fake, in fact Joe Francis, the authority and my partner in crime in all things fantastic (including but not limited to Nerf weapon arsenals) pointed out that some homies have set off to the desert to find it. And when I say "find" I mean it in the devious action movie sense, a.k.a. kill with dynamite.

Considered dangerous because of it's ability to spit acid out of it's mouth and lightning bolts out of it's ass (damnnnnnn that is wild) the MDW falls into a group of creatures called "cryptids," or mythological creatures that could be real. Thise group includes Loch Ness Monsters, Big Foots, ChupaCabras, and tree men (wait a moment, tree men are real). And while some people may laugh in the face of the brave souls who seek acid spitting-lightning shitting worms, I say they laughed at Columbus too. Find those worms boys, do it for a forgotten spirit of adventure. You're story is just like "Up," but instead of of cute birds, you pioneers are seeking ferocious worms with deadly gastro-intestinal problems.

August 17, 2009

Tarantino's Must See List

Here we have the sometimes brilliant, usually bizarre, and always interesting Quentin Tarantino dropping science about his favorite films since 1992. With "Inglorious Basterds" coming out on Friday, there no doubt will be a PR blitz of all things Tarantino. So, with the upcoming onslaught on the horizon, I wanted to share this video (via the amazing website /film) with everybody because it provides an very atypical list of films since 1992. For those of you who don't want to watch the whole video, here is the list
Battle Royale (TPG)
Anything Else
Blade (TPG)
Boogie Nights
Dazed & Confused (TPG)
Fight Club (TPG)
Friday (TPG)
The Host (TPG)
The Insider (TPG)
Joint Security Area
Lost In Translation
The Matrix (TPG)
Memories of Murder
Police Story 3
Shaun of the Dead (TPG)
Speed (TPG)
Team America (TPG)
Unbreakable (TPG)

I have put a little TPG next to the films that I have seen (yeah I haven't seen "Boogie Nights" or "Lost in Translation", relax all you hipsters and film elitists, I'll get to them one day). I have to say I really agree with many of the films on his list. Tarantino was famously a video store clerk before he became famous, and his love of cinema is reflected on this list.

Many of these movies are notable because they started a trend. An example of this would be "Shaun of the Dead" which kickstarted the whole screwball comedy horror genre (see the upcoming "Zombieland" as an example). So, while this list can be a little daunting, I would recommend that you watch "Unbreakable" before any other film on this list. It's an incredibly interesting and mis-understood movie. You go see that and I'll see "Boogie Nights." Deal?

August 14, 2009

Have a great weekend

Time to intensely relax!

District 9 And The Many Meanings of "Alien."

  • Foreigner: a person who comes from a foreign country; someone who does not owe allegiance to your country.
  • Stranger: anyone who does not belong in the environment in which they are found
  • Estrange: arouse hostility or indifference in where there had formerly been love, affection, or friendliness; 
  • Extraterrestrial being: a form of life assumed to exist outside the Earth or its atmosphere
  • Being or from or characteristic of another place or part of the world; 

"District 9" is an astounding film that takes what you think you know about aliens (and humans) and explodes it in a dazzling burst of brilliant imagination. Everything in this film, from the writing, filming, editing, action, sound design, acting, and special effects feels refreshing. And most importantly this is a film that uses aliens to make a profound statement about the state of the human condition in the year 2009.

If you aren't aware, the basic premise of the film is that 28 years ago, a giant alien spaceship parked over Johannesburg, South Africa, and the humans in an apparent act of kindness, gave the aliens a place to live outside of the ship. This place was called District 9 and is basically a gigantic ghetto. All this addressed in the first 10 minutes of the film, and the rest of the narrative follows a human man who is charged with leading the liquidation of the alien ghetto. Things do not go as planned.

My mind is spinning on how amazing the film was, and I have lots to say about it, but I will just leave you with this tidbit. One of the most favorite things about the film is how your view of the aliens and humans flip during the film. At the start of the story, we the viewer are sympathetic to the humans, after all they are "our" kind. However as the story progresses, through the humans cruelty toward each other and the aliens, I found myself feeling alienated from the them and slowly rooting for the aliens. This change in my emotions is evident in the physical and emotional change of the film's protagonist. That is just one of the film.

I have not even touched on the political, economical, or social allegories that fill the movie. Nor have I mentioned the amazing style of the film including never before seen camera techniques and brilliant editing of different types of camera footage (news, security, interviews). When I left the theatre, I was highly satisfied with the film, but after thinking about it, I find my enjoyment is rising exponentially, it's depth is incredible. And without a doubt, it is the film of the summer, if not the year (so far)

August 13, 2009

Gentlemen Broncos Trailer

This is the spiritual follow up to "Napoleon Dynamite." This is also  film that screams of

Alien movies that messed me up as a child.

In honor of the upcoming "District 9" I have decided to reflect back on the aliens of my youth. You see, scary ass aliens from movies giving me nightmares was as much as part of my childhood as being terrible at baseball (I was kicked off my T-Ball team). There was almost a routine to it; my mother would go out for the night and I would sit down and watch a Sci-Fi (aka bloodthirsty alien flick) with my Pops and brothers. And let my clarify while a majority of these flicks were terrifying, they all were mind meltingly awesome and shaped me into the man I am today.

This movie sparked an intense action figure collecting spree with my brother Joe Francis that lasted for at least a year, two years if you include Predator action figures. But man, this is the one alien flick that really rips your chest open or melts your face off with the acid blood. Everything about these modafuckas is terrifying. Let's go through their life cycle.

-Face hugger lays eggs in your tummy by sticking tail down your throat
-Baby alien bursts out of your stomach like a demon jack in the box
-Alien terrorizes and kills your buddies in a cold spaceship that metaphorically reflects the dangers of space industrialization.
-Space Marines/Ripley/Bishop kill it but not definitely cause there needs to be a sequel.

I didn't even mention the ability to climb on any surface, diamond dagger teeth, huge pointed tail, or acid blood.

What these bad guys lack in intelligence they make up in up in sheer volume. Not to say these things weren't dangerous, I mean look at that clip, lots of people getting diced up, but they seem just a little too killable. My dudes Johnny Rico and NPH quickly found out that they were actually very susceptible to death and continually dispatched them over the course of two lackluster sequels.

Ehhhhhhh mon, the dreadlocked rasta mon indergalatic bounty hunter brah. Weapons include but are not limited to spears, shoulder mountain cannon, retractable blades mounted on his hands, and some really sweet dreads. Yet despite all of this, every movie since the first one has been terrible. Here's hoping his new reboot will deliver the goods.

August 12, 2009

Searching for Rising Stars In Los Angeles

By all means this should be a post filled with frustration for the city of Los Angeles. You know, the city that is full of light, so powerful it spills into the blackness of the night. The city that produces so much smog that it obscures the views of the heavens. And the city that prevents the land dwellers from seeing the meteor shower. The parade of falling stars that was was hyped up as an event, something to drive great distances for, stay up late to see, and totally worth the extra espresso shot in the AM.

You see, while I didn't see any falling stars last night, it still a night worth remembering. In a town when meetings with friends can be scheduled events and young people make phone calls to other young people on behalf of older people, it's a special evening when four friends can spontaneously get together for something that doesn't involve a screen. Here we were, four pals, together on a roof of a house, slightly happy we survived the climb to the top of roof, and with nothing but the hazy sky above us and the sound of city drifting to sleep around us.

Even though Los Angeles does a great job of obstructing the space above us  we gazed into the tiny patch of stars we could make out, hoping to see a star crashing through the sky. There is something poetic about looking for falling stars in a city full of people seeking to become stars. In fact rather than calling them falling stars, why don't we focus on the replacement stars, the ones that rise up out of nowhere to take the fallen one's places. So while I missed the shower, hopefully somewhere in thislalife there was a star rising. 

August 10, 2009

A Perfect Getaway Keeps the Surprises Coming

"A Perfect Getaway" is a summer (with a blood red sunset) surprise in a season full of robots and wizards. Like the killer that stalks the couples through the Hawaiian jungles, each move in this film is calculated to keep you guessing.  It's mostly psychological, in fact the plasma seeking gore hounds will no doubt be disappointed by the general lack of "spaghetti sauce."

I don't want to reveal too much but the basic story is this: three couples are hiking in Hawaii and one couple out of the trio are bloodthirsty killers. That's it, all I'm telling. You should know that the script by David Twohy is solid and holds up all the way through. The acting too is surprisingly good, with each actor from Steve Zahn ( who according to my pal, ALWAYS BRINGS IT YO)to Kiele Sanchez (Nikki from Lost Season 3) delivering good performances.

However, credit must be given to Twohy is has got to be one of the most under the radar writer/directors in the game. His previous work is full of sleeper hits (Chronicles of Riddick: Pitch Black) and terrible mega bombs (Chronicles of Riddick). Twohy wrote and directed this movie and watching it you get a sense that this is a story teller spinning a yarn that he cares about.

I'm not going to say get ready to have your mind blown, but I don't think you'll be disappointed either.

**Expect another post about Chris Hemsworth, aka Thor who dare I say brings the thunder in this film in the few scenes he's in.

Surviving Without Seeing G.I. Joe

I want to see G.I. Joe. There I said it, I feel like a massive weight equal has been sliced with a glimmering katana from my shoulders. You see by all accounts G.I. Joe looks like a pretty damn fresh movie to me. It's got one of more of the following items which usually peaks my interests regarding a summer movie
Exotic Weapons
Whiz Bang POWWW Gadgets
Ninjas! Ninjas! Ninjas!
Sword Fights
Cool Special Effects (or so it appears)

I'm just kidding about that last one, but you see like on paper it sounds like it would be right up my alley. When I try to process why I didn't see it at midnight I think back to the words of a wise old prophet in Hollywood
"Son, once you get out of the demographic, nothing's the same." 

Damn, that wise old sage with maroon beard was correct, I'm out of the demo for G.I. Joe. It's strange this feeling of growing up, but I think it's natural.

Sorry Joe, maybe, I'll, umm, see you around, , on a rainy Saturday afternoon, you'll be on HBO, and I'll be bored, and well, I've said to much. Go play with your accelerator suit.

August 7, 2009

Have A STRONG Weekend

Props to the legendary  Joe Francis for the pic

GI.....Doug....Liman or the amazing true story of how a hollywood action director saved the day.


Here I was prepping a "G.I. Joe" post and BAM thanks to the web site Deadline Hollywood Daily this gem of a real life action movie sequence hits me like an accelerator suit punch to the stomach. It appears that Doug Liman, the director of the first (and 2nd best) Bourne movie saved some lives yesterday on the Hudson river. As a lover of all things exciting and fantastic, this story is pretty damn rad. I mean it would be cooler if Liman was being chased by religious dudes in red hats in Venice, but I'll take New York any day.

Apparently Liman and his producer/fellow adventurer Avram Ludwig (classic sidekick name) were sailboating on the Hudson, when they saw a speedboat collide with a tanker (no big deal, y' know). They swooped in and rescued the survivors (of the speedboat). You can check out the whole story complete with in-correctly named movie titles here

It's also worth mentioning that the Hudson River seems to be the go to place for real life high drama. Let's not forget good ol Captain Sully and his daring landing on the Hudson a couple of months ago. Damn, all we need now is a Los Angeles skyscraper with a NYPD officer inside to get taken over by highly armed foreign thieves.

Congrats Doug Liman, your heroic action movie actions have earned you the first TOILET CHOMP of August.

August 5, 2009

"Am I Holding This Thing Backwards?"


I'm in the mist (or is it midst) of a wild time at work, posting this week will be limited to pictures from classic flicks withwitty captions that I hope will make you smile.

August 3, 2009

Tomato Sauce White Tee Adventure Tips

Eating red pasta sauce, yeah the tomato kind with a white t-shirt is how you can live on the edge in a life that doesn't require actually risking your life, unless you are hyper allergic to pasta sauce and if a drop touches your body you get hives, which begs the question why are you eating tomato sauce?

It's little things like this that can capture the sense of adventure that the marvelous "Up," other things you can do to capture this include the following

1. Cherry Pit Spitting Contests- something I'm working on, my power or accuracy is nowhere close to where I wish it could be

2. Sticking Your Head Under A Modestly Sized Waterfall- Course you have to find a waterfall, which is part of the adventure

3. Not play Halo for 24 Hours- Tougher than you think

4. Not look at your phone/blackberry/iphone for an hour- This is easiest to do when doing activities involving water.

5. Making S'Mores While Dressed in All Black- The flip side of the tomato sauce adventure.